Parenting milestones nobody mentions Pt. 2

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And now, since babies grow and develop exponentially fast, here’s a second installment of parenting milestones not mentioned in the books:

:: The first (or 15th) time you wake up on the floor of the nursery snuggled up with a baby-sized blanket and a stuffed animal under your head.

:: The first time baby picks up a piece of dog food, puts it in her mouth and chews before you realize what’s happening.

:: Even more importantly, the first time you say, “eh, dog food isn’t the worst thing she could be putting in her mouth…”

:: That moment you feel confident enough to offer advice to the new mom because you’re no longer her.

:: The first photo of a meltdown because if you don’t find humor in the screaming, suddenly extremely strong child, you’re going to lose it.

:: The day you realize even babies steal, and it’s just as upsetting for her to have a block taken as it’d be if someone took off with your purse. Naturally you respond the same way — chasing that kid down and taking back what was rightfully yours hers.